MASTER THE FAIL, EMPOWER THE PREVAIL-
APOLOGISING
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If you think that apologising is hard, what comes after it is harder. When you apologise, it means that you are taking responsibility for your actions. Apologising does not mean that you are admitting that the whole argument is your fault. It only means that you now know what you have done wrong and you are ready to deal with the consequences of your actions like an adult. Apologising first does not make your “more” wrong than the other person involved. When you apologise, you are establishing what actions you regret and confirming where your boundaries are at the same time. You should be fair to both yourself and the other person when you make an apology. Own up to your behaviour but do not accept all the blame if it’s not your fault at all.
Apologising helps you and the other party move forward and leave the conflict behind you. However, your apology should not end with just your words. You have to follow it up with your actions. You should show that you mean what you said by showing that you’ve learned from the argument. Your actions should be consistent with your apology. TEDx Keynote Speaker Jahan Kalantar will gladly guide you.
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Most people are not fond of the idea of apologising because of how their thoughts and feelings on saying sorry do not align. For example, at a young age you experienced being forced to apologise to someone you are not really apologetic towards due to a fight in the classroom or in the playground. Some people avoid apologising altogether, especially when they believe that they are right or when their pride is at stake. Unfortunately, refusing to apologise and ignoring the issue is a surefire way to lose one or two relationships in your lifetime.
Some people feel like an apology is an admission that something is wrong with them instead of seeing that they just made a mistake. Others believe that being the first to apologise after a misunderstanding is an admission that they are wrong, guilty, and are responsible for the entire argument. People need to start learning that apologising first does not mean that the other person will take no responsibility for their own part in the conflict. If done right, an apology addresses the issue, resolves the problem, reaffirms shared values, and restores positive feelings. Sydney’s Keynote Public Speaker Jahan Kalantar can show you how it’s done.
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An apology is supposed to show how remorseful you are about your actions and acknowledge that what you have done has caused another person to experience pain, hurt, anger, etc. But apologising does not mean that something is inherently wrong with you. Everyone makes mistakes every once in a while, and everyone has the capability to hurt people through words and actions. Apologising is not the easiest thing to do, but it is a good way to start restoring trust and balance in any form of relationship.
Most people find it hard to apologise, and sometimes the way they say sorry ends up making things worse. Although everyone has different ways of handling things, apologies are a bit harder to compose without a formula. Some things should be avoided when apologising like blaming the other person for your actions, justifying your behaviour, downplaying what you’ve done or excusing your actions. Doing any of these things will weaken your apology or even render it useless. Learning the right way to apologise can help you save a relationship or start the healing process for both you and the other party. TEDx Keynote Speaker Jahan Kalantar can guide you to writing or thinking of the perfect apology.